Possessed Vaccum Cleaner

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This is not the way a vacuum cleaner is supposed to sound. It is not right.When you turn it on it has to warm up for a few min. When the clanking sound stops,and it is the deep roaring sound that warms your down to your toes starts up and does not stop.

Why I do not get another one is beyond me, but when I am in any store that sells vacuum cleaners that hums instead a growling and clanking noise ,I cannot buy one. Not because of monetary ( about 75% of the time that is why) I stand and stare at the new shiny mentally healthy, physically able to suck the paint out of my carpet( that sounds kinda bad) and then I walk away.

Why you ask?

It is because the damn thing is possessed. It works when it wants to, and usually only when you are sucking up a sock or a cord is when it hums happily like a normal machine. But when you pull it out it goes right bad to borderline shrieking at you. And I am convinced it is fine when I am in the store.

Never mind the burning rubber smell. We cover that up with the smelly powder. Which is flammable BTW.

Never mind it skips around the actual sucking bits of flotsam from the carpet and you have to go over the same area three times to get that stupid piece of lint up.

I have friends that are screaming at me to buy new *insert half ass broken thing here* but until it is actually broken I just cannot justify buying something to replace the one that just doesn't run as fast or well or good.

Some days I would love to open up wide to a therapist and figure out exactly what is going on in my head. Maybe that is what make this OK; I acknowledge that I am nuts.